Thursday, March 17, 2011

HEADS (This isn't the same Heads)

I was somewhat disappointed by reading a good book about heads. So I I had to post another book about heads that lived up to my horrible expectations. This book was not good and named "Heads"; so it clearly suites the whole blog better than a good book called "Heads". Both also host a prominent head on the cover.

HEADS by David Osborn

This man is clearly getting the most terrifying head massage ever! Perhaps a truly fear-inducing spinal adjustment! No, I bet it's about doctors taking people's heads off.

What I got:
A splendidly bad piece of sci-fi involving Scooby-Doo obvious mysteries, a love triangle where one player doesn't have a body- and a lady doctor catfight scene. Delivered a room full of talking, problem solving heads with a tendency for committing suicide.

Cover execution:
7/10. The blond doctor gets his head taken off by dark haired doctor. I suppose they could have been more overt- (and in fact they don't pick the heads up and carry them around or anything), but a little mystique helps. Bonus for the awesome Heavy Metal inspired font for the title.


HEADS by Greg Bear

A huge space head rules the moon.

What I got:
A very good book exploring an interesting vision of the future and a set of cultures/political groups residing on the moon. The book delivered not one massive head but 410 frozen heads, in addition to a rather clever and biting attack on cult religions ::coughcoughSCIENTOLOGYcough:: and cool negative-time experiments. And an ending I had to read twice for full effect.

Cover execution:
The theme was there, but the forced perspective left me hoping for some Galactacus-esque head that would eat the moon or something. Also, if that's supposed to be the main head causing the source of contention in the book, it's sadly not accurate in depiction. If it was the head I'm thinking the illustrator intended, it would be an obese person's head, not this trim icy visage. Also, lack of cooling station allusion- which plays a more important role in the book almost, than the heads.

Still, frozen head on the moon is the gist of it.


The Silver Metal Lover by Tanith Lee.

There's going to be a very foppy silver robot man. He will woo a woman with poetry, roses and show her the meaning of true love.

What I Got:
An extremely foppy robot man woos a very vapid 16 year old in the space future with roses and songs. She cries endlessly in wanton misunderstanding of emotion and eventually becomes stronger through learning to love her robot man and breaking away from her controlling mother and rich life. They have magical, Dickens-esque poor times together. Silver, (the aptly-named robot man), is recalled. The girl cries a lot, but with purpose and sorrow. Then the robot's ghost-program talks to her through a ouiji board at her friend's house. She becomes a strong woman of THE FUTURE.

Cover Execution:
8.5/10. All it needed was a weeping, doe eyed woman child on the cover and it would be a near-perfect image of the book. They even got his velvety-long red hair just right!

Onward to "Heads" by Mr. Bear. Which, on the first chapter, promises me not just a few... but over FOUR HUNDRED frozen space heads.

What is this?

So, recently I got to thinking about how amazing* book covers can be. I'm on the search to find some of the most astounding artifacts, and then I am going to choose the best** and read a few to see if it can possibly live up to the astounding*** cover. Instead of annoying my coworkers with this useless info, I'm blogging it. For posterity.

* could mean truly wonderful, could mean simply horrible
** could also mean worst
*** astounding does by definition mean "startling or bewildering", so this is accurate